Just go, C!
I'm Charity, a proud auntie, wine lover, semi-nerd, and dreamer who can't stay in one place for too long.
The morning after I landed in Bangkok, I was too scared to leave my hotel room.
No joke. Once again, just trying to keep things real here, man. I was so intimidated. Thank goodness my TESOL agency arranged transport to the hotel from the airport, because I probably wouldn't have even left the airport otherwise. I chuckle about it now, because of course, I did leave my hotel room and even (gasp!) saw a pretty decent amount of Bangkok before leaving Monday morning with my classmates. But man, those first 12 hours or so were really something. I have never felt so isolated and alone in my entire life as I did in the first few hours. I arrived earlier than everyone else in my group so there wasn't really an opportunity for me to hang out with anyone. Of course I don't speak Thai, and I'm in a very big, busy, noisy city with no clue of where anything is. That's about as scary as it gets for me. I posted on a couple Facebook forums I followed asking for advice, and a couple people suggested I check out this-and-that place, which was great, but what I really wanted to ask was, "Could someone please save me from this horrible feeling and just tell me every little step I need to take to feel somewhat normal?" So I had a little conversation with myself - which if you have been reading this blog for a while, you know how often this occurs - and decided I was going to buck up and just walk to the 7 Eleven. That's it. Just a few blocks away. I'd grab some water and toilet paper (another story for another time) and hurry my way back to my panic...er, hotel room. That was my way of "negotiating" with myself. So that's what I did. And something kinda cool happened on the way. I was walking along the maze of alleys, which was definitely a culture shock in itself (not recommended for the germaphobic), and started to go down one alley, and there was a group of guys sitting on their motorbikes talking and laughing to each other. One of the guys noticed me and said, "Hey. Hello. Where you going." I thought, oh shit, here we go. Defensive Jet Li Kung Fu mode and Impenetrable Shield = activated I smiled and tried to look really confident. "7 Eleven!" He smiled back at me and pointed to another alley: "That way." Wellllllllll F. There went my Joe Cool façade. I thanked him and headed in that direction, and sure enough, he had pointed me in the right way. Call me a major cornball, but I don't take moments like that very lightly. I really interpreted that as a message that IT WAS GOING TO BE OK. That guy reassured me that there weren't big scary people lurking at every corner waiting to attack me. I could do this. And so, I "did it" - that afternoon, I took the local BTS (train) and river boat to the Wat Pho and Wat Arun temples. I went somewhere new every day. I drank coconut water from an actual coconut. I stuffed myself onto an express boat with too many other people, definitely zero personal space and mucho B.O. involved. I ordered meals despite language barriers. I shopped in street markets and malls, despite the fact that there were very few places selling "bigger" clothing. I tried mango and sticky rice for the first time. And then tried it three more times. ;-) I would get back to my room in the early evening, completely exhausted from all the walking and sight-seeing. Please understand that I'm not saying any of this to try to "show off" but to make a point that doing something you're afraid of often requires one small, tiny step in the direction you want to go. Kinda like "baby steps to the elevator" for all the What About Bob? fans in the house. And often times, things aren't as scary as we make them out to be. It's been a FULL first week in Thailand. I'm in Hua Hin now for my TESOL class and soaking up so much already about the culture and language. I can't wait to tell you more. Stay tuned....
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Wow, Australia. Just wow.
I've been spending the last hour or so going through ALL of the photos I took while traveling about this massive country. It's incredible how there are so many different landscapes, cities, climates, and even the people are different from place to place. That is what I have loved most about this country - there is truly never a dull moment. I have loads of praise to give, but let me just say this: This place is INSANE. There are many, many different ways one could die here that are uniquely Australian. Every day, something happens in nature that makes it to the evening news. A shark eats a human. A snake eats a kangaroo. A spider eats a snake. A human eats Vegemite and somehow survives. A cyclone floods everything in sight. A heat wave makes Hell look somewhat attractive. Even the freakin' JELLYFISH are out to get you. Good God, why would anyone want to live here? And that brings me to the people of Australia. The Ozzies are a unique breed of human. I am confident that if/when the zombie apocalypse occurs, the Australian people will be among the few who survive it. It takes a special kind of grit to live in a place like Australia. You would think that considering the environment(s), they'd be a little gruff or grumpy and in a constant state of defensive survival mode. But quite the opposite is true. I have met some of the most friendly, warm, down-to-earth people ever while here. I never once had an experience with someone who was rude in any way, except maybe for a few passive-aggressive drivers but they were probably tourists, anyway. I think living in a country that was built by convicts gives them a special kind of character. I absolutely LOVE the sense of humor Australians have. They are pretty sarcastic, "cheeky" people who love to poke fun at themselves and at each other as long as it's not overstepping any boundaries. I also love that they have a unique ability to either completely underestimate or completely blow anything out of proportion. When I was traveling through the Northern Territory, one of the hotel managers I stayed with made it sound as though I was on the verge of certain death by driving up to Darwin. "You know that you're going to drive straight into a cyclone, right?" Thanks for that. Turns out it wasn't a cyclone (yet) but it definitely rained a lot. Fortunately I lived to tell the tale. But tell an Ozzie that one of his close friends was just bitten by a poisonous snake, and you might get a response something to the effect of, "Ahhhh she'll be 'right, mate! No worries!" I just love it. For all of its danger, Australia is one of the most beautifully diverse areas on the planet. I am very happy that I chose to road trip my way through it. The long driving days were more than made up for with incredible scenery on every trip. Even the areas that had very little vegetation or land formations were beautiful to me. There were times when it felt like I was the only human being on Earth. You could drive for hours and see maybe 1-2 other cars. I got an adrenaline rush every time I'd see a sign telling me there wasn't going to be another fuel stop for hundreds of kilometers. It's a little intimidating, but there's something thrilling about it, too. I don't consider myself a "big city" person but I fell in love with Melbourne. It was where I stayed the longest out of every place I visited. It's a very eccentric city, but it has an energy unlike anywhere else I've visited and a strong heart. It kind of reminds me of a dysfunctional family where everyone is a little batshit crazy but they love each other to the core. I'm really going to miss it here. I'll miss the beaches, the rainforests, the adorable koalas, the people I had the pleasure of meeting, the accent, of course... But, I consider myself to be very fortunate to have "heaps" of fond memories and great stories to tell from my time here. And in case you ever come to visit, here is a miniature guide to Aussie abbreviations and sayings because they abbreviate EVERYTHING: McDonald's (restaurant) = "Macca's" mosquitoes = "mozzies" football = "footy" as in Rugby league Brisbane (city) = "Brissy" (said like "Brizzy") afternoon = "arvo" (no idea where that came from) avocado = "avo" breakfast = "brekky" cup of coffee or tea = "cuppa" Other things of note: They say, "How ya goin'?" instead of "How are you?" But you still say "fine" or "good" in response. A "bogan" is an unrefined sort of person, like a "hick" in the U.S. They never say "throw another shrimp on the Barbie" - I know, disappointing, right? First, the don't say "shrimp" - they say prawns. And they very rarely throw prawns on the Barbie. It's usually "snaggers" which are sausages or hot dogs. They say "Far out!" quite a bit which is sort of like, "Holy cow!" or "No way!" You'll often hear "too easy" when you thank someone after getting help or service. It basically means "no problem" but it threw me off when I first heard it. I just remember thinking, "I can make it harder for you next time, mate!" They also usually say "heaps" instead of "lots" or "loads", and if there is a lot to do or see in an area, then you are "spoilt for choice." They will say, "Good on ya!" or "Onya, mate" when they mean "well done" or "good for you!" Hopefully that will come in handy for whenever you decide to come visit. And, I hope you do, mates. G'day. First, let me apologize for that terrible blog title. Let me also apologize for not changing it, even though I know it's terrible.
So, my time in Australia is coming to an end. Only 1.5 weeks remaining in this crazy, crazy country. I'll do my farewell tribute blog entry to Australia, I'm sure, when I'm on my flight out. I just want to make sure I don't die here first. Because it's completely possible in Australia. Anything - and I mean anything - is possible in Australia. As you probably know already if you're following along, I'm headed to Thailand next. I am going to be very honest with you and say that I am scared to go to Thailand. I'm scared because English is not widely spoken there, and this will be my first experience in such a country. I'm scared that I'll go through the TESOL course and have a difficult time finding a job. And most of all, I'm scared to go to Thailand as an overweight woman. I know I know, it IS rather unfortunate to feel this way, but this blog (for me, at least) is all about being vulnerable and being honest, as much as it is about traveling and seeing the world. And so, I am being honest. I know already that Asian women are typically smaller in build. What I didn't know until recently is that many plus-sized gals have experienced some scrutiny and unwelcome comments when traveling to SE Asia. It is also very difficult to find clothing over size "large" - and I say "large" in quotes because it sounds like anything over a woman's size 8 is considered "large" over there. And as someone who has struggled with body issues her entire life, this is definitely cause for anxiety. While I was reading all of these stories online, I felt sick to my stomach and my FIRST thought was, "I've gotta back out of this. I can't do this. I can't handle someone pointing at me and making a comment about my weight." I was seriously in a panic. I know myself well enough to know that my gut reaction is always emotional, and after a while I'm able to reflect on the situation from more of a rational standpoint. First, if they do make fun of me, I probably won't know it because they'll be speaking a language that I don't (yet) understand. Second, these bloggers' experiences don't guarantee that the same thing will happen to me. Thousands of people visit Thailand every year, many of them probably overweight, and I'm reading what, maybe 7 or 8 blogs? Third, I am willing to bet that I'm going to lose weight anyway over there without really even trying. Most of the people eat the local street food. The food is MUCH fresher, in smaller portions, locally-sourced, with simple ingredients. Most of weight loss is what you eat so I should be good there. And, getting around is going to require some effort. Most people take public transport, ride a bike, or walk. And, I'll have to go up and down stairs for my month-long course. I'll have to be more active whether I like it or not. (Thankfully, I'm actually looking forward to being more active.) And because it's so hot there, I will probably sweat out most of the calories, anyway. Ha! One thing I'm constantly learning about and trying to improve upon is my intention. I really do believe that once you commit to something, 100% with your full heart and soul, that some pretty incredible things happen in the universe to help make it happen for you. Call it God or the powers-that-be or the law of attraction, whatever it is, I have experienced firsthand the power of intention and the results it can bring. I am definitely going to Thailand. I am definitely going to follow through on my commitment to complete the course I signed up for. I am going to be open to any experiences, whether they are successes or lessons. I'm proud of myself for not backing out. I really believe in my core that this will be exactly what I need, at exactly this time in my life. I am still nervous and scared, of course. But just as I've said from Day 1, that's exactly why I'm doing it. Even still - feel free to say a little prayer for me. |
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AuthorHi! I'm Charity. I'm from Omaha, Nebraska, USA. I quit my job in October 2016 to travel the world. Archives
June 2022
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